Friday, 31 August 2007

Is The World Weird Enough? Part 23.

Here´s a human interest story, from Der Spiegel and Lawyers Weekly. I don´t read that trash (it was also printed in Private Eye magazine).

"Two years ago, a space ship sucked me up into its interior and carried me off into space. The aliens probed my anus and genitalia, then manipulated my brain and sent me back to earth as an apprentice shaman, to bless the city in advance of the arrival of further aliens. Following their orders, I closed my bank account, bathed naked in a municipal fountain, then rode my bicycle naked through the streets of Dresden, at which point I was arrested by police and sent to a psychiatric hospital. But I have done nothing wrong. I am a victim of aliens, and I demand my freedom" - Paul Hoffman.

A lawyer named Jens Lorek, who specialises in this sort of thing, has taken the case.

See how unrealistic Independence Day was? I like the sound of these aliens. They appear to have a finely tuned sense of humour.

My next post will answer the question that everyone on earth has asked themselves, at least once (although I think about it every day, and have done for more then three decades) - who would win in a fight between a polar bear and a rhinoceros? I am taking bets.


sidegift said...

If it wasn't for the fact that the polar bear and the rhino are in different groups we could finally get an expert's opinion on this conundrum

James said...

I wonder what a bout between Joschka Fischer (most aptly described as a toothless walrus) and a man-eating tiger would turn out.

In the case of your question, I ask if I may donate the carcass of the loser to Al Gore, stop him eating african babies, even if for a few hours.

Jonathan Pinkleton-Smythe III (Lord of the isle of Man) said...

Dude, funny shit. I have an alien up my butt, helps me fart different musical notes. I would personally choose the rhino, but only if you put it on an ice rink.