Today, I was going to write about how we sholdn't allow paedophiles to strip search children at airports, but the BBC have already covered this, and they get a few more visitors then I do.
So here is today's mess.
I had a call yesterday from my London based bodyguard, Alan Walker.
Mr Walker is one of the most highly decorated civillians in the United Kingdom. He received the Queen's Commendation for Bravery a few years ago - he saved someone's life by fighting an armed, convicted rapist, and restrained the felon until police arrived. This is just the tip of the iceberg regarding Mr Walker's selflessness - he has several similar awards.
How do we treat our heros?
Mr Walker dropped a cigarette butt on the pavement in a London street. He was accosted by two council workers, who decided to demand a fine of fifty pounds. Seventy five pounds, if he doesn't pay up quickly. If Mr Walker exercises his right to appeal and loses, he will face a fine of up to two thousand five hundred pounds. For dropping a cigarette butt.
I do not normally advocate swearing, as it debases our wonderful language...but what the fuck is going on? It is OK to use depleted uranium in the Middle East and poison the earth for millions of years to come, but if you drop a half inch piece of paper, you get threatened by people pretending to be policemen.
I'm tempted to suggest that Mr Walker is being hassled because of his sexual orientation.
Get out those "V" masks.
(oh, if anyone sees any spelling mistakes here, please point them out. Blogger have disabled my spellcheck (and several other things) for reasons best known to themselves. Wankers.)